A Tentative Hope That We Can Do Better

I have to believe that we white ladies can do better, be better despite the damning evidence. Why? Because if I didn’t hold out some hope in my brethren, then what does that say about me? The truth is, white lady therapy is a social experiment. 

What if we had the kind of space to actually face ourselves, say things that we are afraid to say, surface things that govern our behaviors but are often hidden to us? What might it actually take to shift our internal conditions, be more comfortable with ourselves, and move in the world differently? And if we did, what difference would it actually make? That last one is an honest question, we can be so tragically self-important. 

The jury is still out, but In this work so far, I’ve seen that a little can go a long way, the perspective we seek, the practices we need are not so far from many of us. I have seen this work manifest in: leading work that built a diverse and representative board for a new organization, winning the fight for the Black candidate who also happened to be the most qualified, seeing that time pressure was self imposed and taking time to design a more inclusive training, learning when to sit with a feeling and sparing the world in not saying the white lady thing. Each of these is a small offering of what might be possible. For now, what I have seen does give me a sense of tentative hope. I’ll keep you all posted. 

-wlt